"Give me a bottle of your best wine!"

The other night a customer got up from their seat and walked over to the wait station.  This is never a good sign.  

Not seeing his server, the customer began speaking to me and one other server who were nearby.

"We have a birthday going on, give me a bottle of your best wine," he said to neither of us in particular.

This request really told me everything I needed to know about the dude's taste in wine.  Specifically, if you want the "best" wine we have, you clearly know very little about wine and probably just want to impress somebody.  Who knows, the person you want to impress might even be me, your faithful server.  

So I rather sadistically pointed him to the most expensive wine on the list, a Super Tuscan, figuring what the hell, the guy wants the best, that probably means the most expensive to his way of thinking.  "Best" is otherwise fairly meaningless when there are countless different types of wines, all with their own qualities which make them excellent in different ways.  In all fairness, that Super Tuscan would be delicious, and if money were no object it might indeed be my personal favorite, even if I wouldn't use the term "best" to describe it.  

The customer didn't buy the most expensive wine I pointed out to him at one hundred and forty bucks, but did get one just a few lines up at one hundred and ten.  This was an excellent bottle of Brunello di Montalcino, certainly fairly priced but almost as certainly way more than what this fellow was planning on spending when he made the mistake of walking over to the wait station and soliciting help from busy servers who were not his own.  

This is just another reason why it is so important, as a customer, to keep your arms and legs inside your table at all times, and to not wander around the restaurant into areas in which you don't belong.  Some smart ass may take you for a hundred bucks, and your wife will yell at you when she sees the credit card statement!