20 % Tie Clips

One of the great things about the service industry is the people you meet. Something about waiting on the public really tends to bind together those who work to serve. On that note I would like to extend a special shout out to my co-worker Erin G who made me a 20 % tie clip. She has a fantastic blog of her own where she shows her work. She's very talented and with the holidays coming up I would suggest considering giving handmade jewelry as a gift to your friends and loved ones!

You'll find her at http://eringriffinjewelry.blogspot.com/

PDA

This is a great contribution from a good friend of mine, on a subject we have touched on here before, though perhaps not quite as hilariously....

PDA

And I'm not talking about the Pennsylvania Department of Agriculture. We've all seen it, and we've all been uncomfortable. Where do you draw the line? I have, of course, been out to dinner with girlfriends and shown them affection. They are my center of attention. There might be some hand holding before the plates arrive at the table. I might squeeze a knee and wink. I even recall, under the right circumstances, loading up a nice forkful of my dish and offering it across the table for my companion to taste. That is, unless the server is present or maybe the restaurant is crowded and we just so happen to be a focal point because of our stunning goods looks and the uncontollable laughter coming from our table. But let me assure you, never, and I mean NEVER have I been involved in an unbridled make-out session in the middle of a restaurant. Now there are certain acceptable levels of PDA. Maybe the red wine has gotten to you a little bit. Maybe your lover's eyes have an extra little twinkle in them tonight. Steal a kiss, please! I am a bleeding heart romantic myself. But there are definitely boundaries.

Last week, while I was working bar, I noticed a table getting a little too affectionate. I even overheard some of the servers murmuring about it. A short while later, a server approached me and asked if one of his tables could move over to the bar. This happens from time to time and there was some sort of game on the television so I promptly agreed. The server then quietly said to me, "Sorry, man." I thought he was apologizing because they had already paid their tab and were bringing over half a bottle of wine to finish without needing (or paying for) my services. It was a pretty slow night and I wasn't concerned about them idling in my otherwise valuable real estate. Little did I know it was the make-out kids. I say "kids" but they were mid 30's to 40 and they thought the bar was their green light for a little extra freedom.

They proceeded to make a complete spectacle of themselves. Two seats over from them, I had two very well-known local bartenders, not to mention two of the best tippers that come to visit me (Thanks, guys!). Honestly, I wouldn't have minded SOME kissing going on at my bar. I can always look away or busy myself with closing duties. But it became a pretty big problem when I stopped looking at them and could still HEAR them. And I don't mean: (smooch) "You look great tonight." Or, "Holy shit, you're beautiful and I love you. Give me a kiss." I mean it sounded like an eight year old kid came in from a blizzard and his mom gave him a grilled cheese and a bowl of Campbell's tomato soup. "Slurp. Mmmm. Slurp. Oh yeah. (some more slurping, possibly some chewing) Slurp. Mmmm." I really think it was minutes away from a pubic display of affection. Yes, I spelled that right. So, of course my two regulars get a little weirded out and anybody that came over to check the score quickly noticed the wannabe Cinemax scene going on.

These are the lines I rehearsed in my head before approaching them:

"Excuse me, guys. Now, believe me, I'm very happy for how well your night is going. Matter of fact, I'm a little jealous. But it's a little too much for the fairly sophisticated dinner atmosphere that we're going for here. Maybe you could take it down a notch."

But as I readied myself for the awkward situation that was about to happen, the slurping got louder. It was pounding in my head head like Poe's Telltale Mouth. My blood pressure went up and I started putting things away by releasing them inches away from where they belonged hoping to show my displeasure for their obliviousness. Then I realized: They were, in fact, upsetting our expected level of behavior. Not to mention, they were compromising my own personal beliefs and limits. I came up with a few choice words on my way around the bar but decided to hold back.

What came out was:

"HEY. There are people TRYING to enjoy their dinner RIGHT next to you. You need to cool it."

They snapped back to reality with a shocked, almost post-coital look on their faces and quickly apologized. I only meant for them to enjoy each other a little less, finish their wine and say "Thanks, Goodnight" but they immediately left. I thought about feeling bad but it was too much and it needed to be done. I did not spend nine years in the fine dining industry to be made to feel like I was working at a drive-in.

I guess the point of my story is that people can see you. Your public displays of affection can be tasteful and even appreciated. Show your love. It might make for a great night for you, your server and even the people around you. Touch her face. Tell her she's beautiful. Tell her a joke. Maybe feed her some of your dinner. But... THERE ARE LINES! Cross them at home.

"Do you do anything special for dessert?"

The other night a customer followed a server over to the wait station and asked, "Do you do anything special for dessert?"

Observing the exchange, I wanted to tell him, yes, I do a soft-shoe tap routine and I sing happy birthday while juggling frying pans and kitchen knives. That would be pretty special, no? But of course what he was looking for was something on the house for his friend who was celebrating a birthday.

Here's the thing, though. She's YOUR friend, so why don't YOU buy her a piece of pie? Why should the restaurant buy her a dessert? We don't know her, or you, and really you shouldn't be up from your table and over here by the wait station, don't you know bad things happen when you leave the table and start wandering around?

Bottom line, we buy desserts for our friends, won't you do the same?

His server was much kinder and gently informed him that we would gladly put a candle on whatever dessert he cared to order for her, and we would bring it out unannounced after all entrees were finished and cleared. The customer returned to his table, but did not order a dessert at this time. He also joked about what a slow eater he was.

Only a few minutes later the mom at the table came over to ask the same question, and got the same answer.

This group of diners had been waiting for their table for a half hour, and the restaurant had felt some chagrin over this and had gone ahead and bought them a round of appetizers. They waited until they finished all those appetizers before they finally ordered entrees, about five minutes after the kitchen closed. Of course their order was honored and their food was prepared to the high standards of our kitchen. It was pretty late by this time, however.

To make matters worse, the gentleman who first asked about the birthday turned out to really be an extremely slow eater. His server was really wanting to clear the entrees and get dessert going since there had been a request for a candle and the kitchen was closing. Finally, at the request of the table, the server cleared the other guests and brought dessert menus.

One guy orders a piece of pie, but it is clear he is ordering it for himself, not the young lady with the birthday. She orders only a cup of coffee. So our server, who had planned to bring a birthday candle adorning some type of dessert, is in a bind.

Undaunted, and with characteristic savoir faire, he takes a birthday candle and melts the bottom of it so that he can fix it onto the handle of the coffee mug. He then brings out the young lady's coffee, and she gamely blows out the candle and makes a wish.

As the server is leaving the table, he hears the slow eater say, "Coffee with a candle? That's cheap!"

Then the same low-life asks his check to be split off and pays only for himself, not chipping in on the birthday girl's meal or anything, let alone springing for a piece of pie. Tip...not 20%

P.S. my friend made me a 20% tie clip, it is so great and I have been wearing it for work. It looks cool and it keeps my tie out of my customer's soup. I will try to get a good picture of it so I can post it....

Larry David is a big tipper!

I have to comment on the most recent episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm, a show I personally enjoy frequently.

In the episode, Larry, the main character, is out for lunch with some friends. When he asks for the check, he notes that a gratuity of eighteen percent has been included. He observes that there is a line to add an additional tip, and remarks to his friends, "Am I supposed to calculate the extra two percent myself?" In the end, he decides not to leave any additional tip in protest to the included gratuity and to the math which its inclusion forces him to perform.

I think this is a valid point on his part. Larry is suggesting that a tip of eighteen percent would require additional tipping, to bring it up to twenty or twenty five percent. He's worth four hundred million dollars, he's happy to leave a thirty percent tip, but don't ask him to calculate the difference between eighteen percent and what his typical tip percentage might be.

Including the gratuity is often done at the discretion of the server, and it can be a "live by the sword die, by the sword" type of situation. On the one hand, if you have a table that has dropped some serious cash on dinner, including the gratuity can be a way to guarantee that they won't lowball you on the tip. On the other hand, a party that springs for an eighty dollar bottle of champagne might turn around and leave you a huge tip. If the gratuity is included, it can be an obstacle for a customer trying to calculate their normal tip percentage. As Larry points out, calculating two or seven percent can be tricky when you are trying to bring the total tip up to whatever your typical tip is.

I think the key here, and the reason this whole episode warms my heart, is that Larry acknowledges that eighteen percent is not an adequate tip for good service. His only issue is with the math. If the server had left off the gratuity, I feel confident Larry would have rewarded his excellent service with a tip of at least twenty percent. Having included the gratuity, the server has to be happy with what he gets.